Emoji Talk, Fun Bucks & Bat Boy The Musical

Welcome to my latest publication of Domestic Chaos Theory…

Emoji Talk. I have some free time, so I decided to learn a second language. French seemed hard. So, I chose emoji instead. It’s not too bad once you get the hang of it. For instance, did you know that the cherry emoji 🍒 means you’re in a committed relationship?

Or that these eggplant/peach emojis🍆🍑 mean you’re a vegan? Or so I’m told. I will say this. I am a bit perplexed by the fact that the texts I receive from these vegans are really damn kinky. Personally, I tend to gravitate to emojis that are more literal. For instance, here’s an emoji I text to my boys when I observe them driving recklessly.

And, of course, here’s the emoji that lets people know my wife is going to her book club meeting.

Quick favor before we keep going.

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Fun Bucks. Being in finance, my oldest son is extremely disciplined. Each week, he sets aside a specific amount of money for discretionary spending. He calls this money “fun bucks”. This choice of language is unfortunate. My wife is now obsessed with the concept of “fun bucks”. The concept of “discretionary”, not so much.

Bay Boy The Musical. Hamilton came to our town. I tried to get tickets. No luck. My wife was not happy. So, I decided to take her to Bat Boy the Musical instead. She was suspicious but calmed down when I told her it was one of Lin-Manuel Miranda’s early plays. Surprisingly, it was not good. Perhaps I should have known. After all, Hamilton was inspired by a book written by a Pulitzer prize-winning author about one of the founding fathers of the U.S. Constitution. Bat Boy, on the other hand, was inspired by a fictitious story written in the Weekly World News about a half-boy, half-bat who grew up living in a cave. Am I losing my good judgment?

MY WIFE’S POV

Last month I shared a story where my wife bought me tickets to Phantom of the Opera for my birthday. Bat Boy The Musical wasn’t the perfect corollary (since it wasn’t technically a present), but it was a form of retribution that my wife didn’t ultimately appreciate. I feel that is unfair. Read the reviews. I’m convinced it will end up on the right side of history.

Unfortunately, my retribution led to her retribution. In terms of the concept of Fun Bucks. Unintended consequences, huh?

My wife thought the emoji bit was kind of funny, mostly because she’s really into visual humor. (As I’ve mentioned previously, she isn’t a big fan of my humor. Which is kind of weird, because she married me. And most women say one of the most important characteristics of a future husband is a sense of humor. I guess you can’t believe everything you read in Cosmo.)

I will stand pat on my POV on book clubs. I’ve been to Super Bowl parties where the participants were more cerebral and got less tanked.

FINAL THOUGHTS

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